8 June 2015

There's something within me that cannot believe in something without knowing the reason why. If I do not understand a motive, I do not trust it. Perhaps this is why I distrust people who only say nice things about me. Perhaps this is why I distrust charity and help. Perhaps that's why I distrust christians so much. 

I think that sometimes christians are very good at acting loving towards someone without actually loving them. They claim to be motivated by love, and yet, it seems that more often, they operate out of a sense of duty as opposed to genuine affection. This unique and well intentioned duplicity is hard to pinpoint and verbalize, but is always detectable. 

I think that a crucial part of loving someone is liking them, at least a little bit. Otherwise it is not honest. It's a false front put up to keep people from seeing what you truly think about them, and I can't reconcile dishonesty with love. How do we balance honesty with loving everyone?  Do we simply love those we can and leave the rest for someone else?

I would rather know that I am not liked than to suspect every friend of kindly meant falsehood. I would rather face the world alone than be surrounded by people who must call upon their God to survive me. 

In a society that claims to value kindness above else, is truth the price we will pay for our attempts at benevolence?